What did the mushroom say to the pretty lady? Nothing, because it's a mushroom.

A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

a little girl gets raped

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

A white man, a black man and a muslim walk into a bar. The bar explodes, but the white man is the only one that dies, thanks to reasonable accommodations.

How many blondes does is take to screw a man? one and a condem

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? N*ggers.

*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

Is this Chick-fil-a? No, this is Joe.

Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

What did the terrorist have for breakfast? Scrambled eggs and a glass of orange juice.

Why do you never hit a black man with your car? Because that's vehicular homicide.

what's the difference between a ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner there is no god and everybody hates you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, it is unclear what the chicken's motivation to cross the road was.

Fuck her

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

yo mama so fat she's fat

What's black, white, and red all over? A zebra that's just been shot, despite the fact that zebra hunting is illegal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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