What's even faster than the speed of light? The speed you close out of porn when you hear someone coming into the room.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Mormon walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Time flies like a banana.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow that's been chopped in half? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why do sausage rolls taste of sausage and not roll? Seriously -_- what?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down +11

That maternal figure of yours is of such inadequate intelligence that she cannot fathom that, given a scatterplot with a linear correlation of greater than -1 and lesser than 1 and a reasonably consistent rise over run, a future value along the y-axis can be predicted if following the y=a(x)+b equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Baseball

thumb_up thumb_down +11

oops

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Write your own

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I farted once. Haiti took the brunt of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The fitting room is a lie. Nothing fit me at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Will gropes Ebola victims

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Tulips are red, And my garden is red. OMG...MY GARDEN IS ON FIRE

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the blonde cross the road? Because she was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the man die? he got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is fat and ugly? Your American MUM!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a school bus full of black people? Not a school bus

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops