Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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a man and a woman are standing at a bar. they have a few drinks and then go home and die.

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a black man and a mexican are sitting in the back seat of a car....whose driving? the cop

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The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

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Whats the difference........ between a duck?

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World Of Warcraft

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

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Got milk? No.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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Whats big, brown and can jump really high... A kangaroo

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what's your favorite soccer team? liverpool

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You say you can read me like a book, well the jokes on you. I am not a book.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

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i am a duck. are you a duck. yes i am a duck.

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How do black people gain access to houses? Through the front door.

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What do you call a black lifeguard? Ironic.

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whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

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What do you call a man with no brain? dead.

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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When was Timothy born? He wasn't.

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You: I have a really funny Knock Knock joke but you have to start it. Someone Else: Okay, Knock Knock You: Who's there? (now watch their face as they become confused)

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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