Knock, knock. Who's there? It's Bob. Oh hi, Bob, come on in.

why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

There was a blond girl, a redhead, and a brunette. They all walk into a hotel and are granted equally friendly desk service because hair color is not a reliable indicator of intelligence or economic status.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere

whats better than a dead baby..... wait..... whats worse than a dead baby...... never mind its not that funny anymore

Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

Why should this joke be funny? It shouldn't, because its an anti-joke.

What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

What is brown and smells? Poop

what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Why did the cow puke up his grass? Because it is necessary so that the cow can re-chew his food to aid with the digestion.

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

Why did the chicken cross the road? Various reasons, one of which was to visit his wife in hospital where she was suffering from a sever case of depression. The other reason was to say his last words to her as she also has lung cancer.

What do your friends and a tree have in common? They both die if you set them on fire.

25

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

What happens when you eat all the strawberries? They are GONE...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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