I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink and then goes home and beats his wife.

Why didn't the boy enjoy his lunch? It was dinner time.

What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

I dislike old people.

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

-Knock Knock -Whos there? -The police -OH SHIT

Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

what's funnier than the holocaust? 2 holocausts and 9/11

What do you call a douche with no arms or legs? A device for washing out the vagina as a contraceptive measure.

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

Women's Golf

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

What do you call a black kid on a bike ? Dirt bike

Q:A man has 100 chocolate bars he eats 93 of them. What has he got now? A:Diabetes

Why couldnt the black man drink from the water fountain? Because the water fountain was broken.

A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

What did the black kid get for Christmas? A Derrick Rose jersey.

A man walks into a bar. End of story.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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