What do you call a black priest? Holy Crap

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

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BUTTERFARTING

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A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

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Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

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why did the boy hug a very dislexic man it was his brother

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

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Why do you put a baby in the blender but first? To see the facial expressions

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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your momma so ugly even she wouldnt date herself.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. ME?!

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

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Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

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Whats big, brown and can jump really high... A kangaroo

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"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

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What do you call a midget sitting in a tree? Jim, because that's his name.

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Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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