dinosours eat beagles and then unicorns eat norwalls then th shiny squarles eat you then unvirse inploads

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What does a bug do in a telephone booth? Eats yogurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

this is an anti joke.... Get it yet

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a truck? You drive a truck, Michael Jackson has anal sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a sackful of dead babies? one is a car and the other is a grotesque travesty.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

When did the black man go to the pharmacy and why ? His wife , for whom he cared very much , had a cold and he had to get her prescription for her . On top of that , he had a horrible problem problem with painkillers that caused him to have an aneurysm on the way there .

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's the difference between Stevie Wonder and Kevin Bacon? There's none. Neither of them is a taxi driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

what is white and red all over? a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -48

What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Q:How do you turn off a Jewish Lamp? A: You press the Auschwitz.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What is one thing you can't buy at the store? Toast

thumb_up thumb_down +51

How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

thumb_up thumb_down +49

why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's your name? You tell me.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops