Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do you call a brunette between two blonds? Probably their friend. How should I know?

What do you call it when a drunk guy puts a tree in his house and then decorates his fireplace with his socks? Christmas (I didn't come up with this)

Wanna hear a joke? A joke.

What do you call a horse, a cow, a pig, a sheep, a dog, a cat, and a mouse all walking in a straight line? Animals

I farted once. Haiti took the brunt of it.

A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

wuts at the end of the world? nothing the earth is spherical and therefore does not have an end

A black man, a mexican man and a chinese man all walk into a supermarket. Together, they purchase ingredients to make a delicious vegetarian lasagna. That night, they make the lasagna and greatly enjoy it together.

Who ate the cookies? Your face. Litterally.

Fish for a man, he has food for tonight. Teach a man how to fish and he will have one more skill under his belt.

I used to be a schizophrenic but we're okay now

Knock knock *No one was home*

How come the twin boys wanted to climb a tree for fun today? Because They both wanted to commit suicide...

This one time, at band camp we played in a band

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

What's worse than being beaten by your Father? Well, it depends.

I was in the grocery store on a sunday afternoon, and i saw a black man. To my surprise, HE DIDN'T BUY ANY FRIED CHICKEN?!?!

BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

like facebook.com/john maon

Q: What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas. A: A specially modified coffin.

a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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