-Whats the worst part about being a black jew? -You have to sit in the back of the oven.

There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

what is white and red all over? a ginger

What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

"hey" said an elephant to another elephant... "why can I talk?" the other elephan did not reply because it is normal and cannot speak or understand the first elephant. And a man near by thinks he's dreaming so he strips down and runs around naked to be tazed on his left testicle an the. Falls into the crocodile enclosure. But they pay no attention because they are docile after being in the zoo so long. But he did land on his balls and is crying.

If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

Why did the cow go moo, because its a cow

Golf.

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He let go of it.

-Knock knock -Come on in!

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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