Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

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What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

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Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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What did the bubble do to the wall? Nothing it is a Bubble.

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What's your name? You tell me.

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Why did little susie fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock who's there? not susie

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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what do you call a cup?... a cup

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what is poop in pee? bagel thins? tuesday.

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How can you tell that a blonde has been using a computer? You can't. There's no common link between computing habits and hair color.

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Why did the black man win the staring contest? He's good at staring

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

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There once was a rich man who owned a really big mansion, he's a very organised man and likes routine, every day at 6.30pm he goes for an hour long jog. One day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his mansion is on fire and he can see a little orange man running away in the distance. But he thinks nothing of it. The man has lost a lot of money, but can still afford to move into a slighty smaller, yet still very large house. The next day he goes out for his jog and when he gets back his big house is on fire and again, he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it, but has now lost even more money, and has to move into a regular size house. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his house is on fire and again he sees the little orange man running away in the distance. He thinks nothing of it and has lost even more money. He is really gutted by this point and now has to move into a single bedroom flat. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his flat is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He still thinks nothing of it and has now lost all his money, and has to move into a cardboard box under a bridge. The next day he goes out for his jog, when he gets back his cardboard box is on fire and again he sees a little orange man running away in the distance. He is sick of this and decides to chase the little orange man. When he catches him he tackles him to the ground, turns him over and asks.. did you burn down my mansion, my big house, my average sized house, my flat, and my box? The little orange man replies no.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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How do you kill a Russian? You shoot him with a gun.

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Womens rights. Are extremely valuable because women are equal.

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

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What does a Mexican do in a landslide? Lose a good deal of his hard earned property to the disaster.

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What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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