A Nazi ran into a Bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your hat is not on you head. Where is it On you head

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What color is my lamp? Brown

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Did you know Helen Keller had a cat? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A man saw a dinosaur. He probably watched it on the television because dinosaurs have been extingt for a very long time.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: Why do Jews have big noses? A: Because air is free!

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Two small boys are walking in a schoolyard. One of the boys sits down under a tree looking distraught. The other asks him "Well whats the matter Eddy?" "Every time I walk to my bus-stop in the morning, Jimmy Krugan, pushes me down and takes my money. " The first boy thinks for sec.. "Well here's what you do Ed; go to your Dad's shed and grab a 2X4, paint it bright blue. In the morning, walk to school with it under your jacket and when Jimmy starts in on you give him a good wallop. He wont be bothering you anymore." The following day the boys are in the yard again. Eddy is seen under the tree seeming just as distraught. Confused, the boy asks him.. "Well Ed, did you do what I told you?" "No."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

the real mccoy

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

The husbant is back from work. He opens the door of closet and finds... Narnia.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to screw it in, the other to suck a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a truck? You drive a truck, Michael Jackson has anal sex with little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Eliza eh? Of you I do not know but at least you used the correct code yourself, I suppose Nero7 kept your existence hidden from most of us for a reason. This "point Zero" is no more, about time people got out of the fucking north pole anyways, he was buried there, as his identity and existence is better off kept secret from the outside world for reasons many, none the less because if he is found and identified, undesired company might track whatever loose threads he might have left, straight back to us and we are not exactly operating within the parameters of... Legality anymore. Listen, if you want to know more give me the code straight out (I could not care less about deciphering shit right now and we are leaving horseshit network anyways) And I will tell you what Major6 knows, because as far as the screams roaming these halls can tell, he is still alive, you just better be fast, my men and women are not exactly experts at keeping these people alive... Yet, but enough idle chitchat. If you are who you claim to be, you should have the code I need, bring it, and I will present you with the neccesary information... ...Fail to do so, and I suggest that you never address any of us again fair lady, while we can simply not be tracked down, the security here is... Do I need to say? Neo-Nero.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

My children are mistakes

thumb_up thumb_down -43

why did the mexican slave have cuts and bruises all over her. She fell off her skateboard... Another joke by rangler. thumbs up for more.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

World Of Warcraft

thumb_up thumb_down -51

whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? ones delicious and the other is a watermelon

thumb_up thumb_down -79

what do you call a pizza with a lot of jalapenos. spicy.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops