wait am i supposed to right the joke down here

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One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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clown penis dot fart? dangle pussy

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Justin Bieber

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? cause there are more geese on one side

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

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Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

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Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin turned to the other and said, "Boy, its getting hot in here." The other muffin said, "WE ARE GOING TO DIE IN HERE AND NO ONE WILL HERE US SCREAM."

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The man who ran behind the bus got exhausted. The man who ran in front of the bus got tired. The first one survived.

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Why cant women drive? Actually, they can

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because-- ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????? ??????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ??????????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????

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Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

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Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

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Why did the insect play marco polo? It couldn't. Marco polo requires multiple players.

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A Jew, a lesbian, and an Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender then cards them and sends them out because they're all under 21.

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"I have some pretty bad news for you, but to ease into it, I will try to work it into a conversation." -Alright Doctor, let's try that." "Hey, how are you feeling today?" -"I feel great!" "That's odd, because you have leukemia..."

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What's 1+1? 4.

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How do you get a blonde to drown herself? Isolate her in an aqueous environment

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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whats round and like a ball a ball

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What do you call a Mexican who steals a car? A criminal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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