Why did the man buy a rope? Because he needed a noose

a boy comes to a girl and ask : do you like vaginas ? and she says course not your dumb ass and he says then give her to me *troll face*

Women's rights.

A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman all walked into a bar. But, the bartender was not happy, as he had noticed that each of them were wearing tops with rude slogans on them. The Bartender said to the Englishman, "you do know that your t-shirt isn't suitable for the children in here, don't you?" "Oh," said the Englishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home to change it at once." Next, came the Irishman, who's top was slightly worse than the Englishman's. The bartender said to the Irishman, "you do know that the joke on your jumper is sexist, don't you?" "Oh," said the Irishman, "I'm sorry, I'll go home and change it at once." Last, was the Scotsman. The Scotsman's top was particularly bad, and the bartender especially did not want this top to be seen in his bar. So, the bartender said to the Scotsman, "you do know that the slogan on your cardigan is racist, don't you?" "Oh," said the scotsman, "I'll go home and change it at once."

I JUST HAD SEEX! How blantant, eh?

Q:"Wanna Here a Joke?" A:"Yea Sure" Q:"Why can't Stevie Wonder read?" A:"Umm....because he's blind?" Q:"No, because he's black."

What's the difference of a team of black people and a pile of shit? None. Kelvin Yang.

Q. What do you call a black priest? A. Holy Shit

There once was a man from Nantucket Whose name was Mike

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't because it got hit by a car.

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

1+1=3 If you don't use a condom.

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

minorities.

What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

Knock Knock Whose there? Yes I am a convicted child molester and by state law I must go door-to-door explaining the many cruel and vigorous crimes I have committed.

Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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