penis that is all

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What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow that's been chopped in half? Dead

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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why did stacey marry bally because she loves him

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A man. That is all.

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Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

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A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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What did the Irisman say to the bartender? Don't know? i don't speak Irish?

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What do a bunch of dead babies look like in a blender? I don't know I was too busy masturbating.

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Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

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Knock knock Whos there? Orphan. Orphan who? Orphan miller. Orphan miller who? Orphan miller jones. Orphan miller jones who? Thats it. Oh okay, I get it you're doing a knock knock joke Yeah. did it go alright? Yeah I guess, untill we started talking in 3rd person.

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Why couldn't the black man get home? His car broke down, and Goodyear was closed.

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Why couldn't the cow move? It had Cystic Fibrosis.

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Why was the man running from the cops? His car broke down.

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Lets make like trees and stand still

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is black.

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Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

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A boat sinks in the ocean, what does the sailor do? Nothing, he wasn't on the boat.

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Why didn't the black man finish high school? He overdosed on heroin.

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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Chuck Norris can beat an eleven-year-old in a fight.

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roses are red violets are red everything's red i'm colour blind

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What would we do with out women? Die and then become extinct

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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