My sister has to take a dump

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haha.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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Why couldn't the orphans go on the field trip? Their parents couldn't sign the permission slip.

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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whats red and smells like blue paint? half a painter.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper with some red stuff on it.

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you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

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Why didn't the Mammoth go to school? Because his species went extinct before the development of organized education. And he's also a Mammoth.

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How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with large genitalia.

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A man walks into a store, and says to the cashier: "I'd like to buy 6 fridges". The cashier says: "Why do you need that many fridges?" The man says: "I'm an antelope!"

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

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-Knock knock -Come on in!

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why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

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Mmmm, donuts

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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