how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

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One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

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Roses are red. So is bacon, Poetry is hard . bacon.

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A murderer takes you hostage. He lists three ways that you will die, but he lets you choose your death: 1. A bullet in your head. 2. A knife in your heart. 3. A lethal injection. What do you choose? It doesn't matter. You're dead.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party??? Cuzz he was a fungi (fun guy)

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alcoholism kills

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

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There was an old woman who lived in a shoe. She had so many children her uterus fell out.

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What's big, red and looks like a bucket? A small blue bucket labeled big red bucket.

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Roses are white Violets are white I did it in the garden

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LOL i just pissed on Hitlers grave! Shoudn't killed the Jews BITCH!

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Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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Why are you here? Because i'm not over there!

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Whats worse then your penis in your mouth? Your mom in your penis.

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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What's funny and arousing? This joke.

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Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas. A pool.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police, we know you've been pirating movies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops