Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the gay guy's house . Knock knock . Who's there? The chicken.

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What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't, it won't come.

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i heart wiener

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Until I lost both my arms.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Why was the black man wet? He was sprayed by a hose.

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An armed ninja walks into a bank. He is apprehended by the police, whom he tries to attack with a drawn sword, and is promptly shot down in a hail of gunfire causing civilian injuries and rather significant property damage.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Down Syndrome

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?", laughs at his own joke, then calls animal control.

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How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

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Why was Martin Luther King assassinated? Because he had a mustache.

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what do you do if a blonde throws you a grenade. scream. run. hide

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a truck? You drive a truck, Michael Jackson has anal sex with little boys.

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Knock, knock. "Who's there?" "Monica" "Monica who?" "Monica Lebinsky, your neighhbor"

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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jacobs 1inch gets matt. t in 4 seconds

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A black man, a hispanic man, and an asian man all walk into a biker bar. The bartender asks them if they know that this is a biker bar. All three say yes and tell the bartender that they are in the same motorcycle club. The bartender serves them a beer.

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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What do you call someone that hates gay people? An asshole.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops