Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

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A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

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What did the otter say to the pumpkin? I'm so glad I'm a walrus

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

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A man walks into a bar, orders a few drinks and becomes drunk. the bartender calls a taxi and the man is driven home.

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A Mexican walks into a club.

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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What did the Ethiopian eat for dinner? Nothing

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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What's samller than a table but can't go under it? A baby with hay fork in his back.

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A man and a women have a conversation. Man: what's 2 + 2 Woman: four. Man: you're correct.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

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Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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How do you kill a fly? Shoot it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Loss of habitat.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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What did the Engineer say to the English major? Hey we went to the same school and got different degrees! Cool!

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whats the best thing about fukkin twentyone year olds...theres twenty of them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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