Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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guess what Beethoven is doing right now. de-composing

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Why did the man fall down the steps? I shot him in the face.

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A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

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How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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What's the only part of a vegetable that you can't eat??? His wheelchair

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where's waldo? in a picture book.

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What does Lady Gaga call Hitler? Nothing special because she doesn't refer to him in everyday's speech.

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I avhe dyiaexls.

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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lol

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Q) what happens when you tackle someone with 2 legs? A) you fall over

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What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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roses are black violets are gray im color blind

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Roses are red, Violets are PURPLE.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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what does the doctor say to the patient. you have cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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