A Fish walks into a bar. It died of oxygen starvation.

What should I name my dog?

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

What do you tell a girl with 2 black eyes? You should ice those to preven swelling aron the eyes

What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

your momma is so stupid she failed math class

What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

how do you confuse a brunette? tell a joke about how there are no beaches in florida

Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

What happens every 10 seconds in Africa? 10 seconds passes by.

What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

What's better than nailing a baby into the wall? Football.

Why was the black man screaming? The KKK was coming to lynch him.

Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

no u

What do you get when you cross a grizzly bear and a dolphin? Well, the odds of these two animals mating are slim to none. Due to the undeniable fact that dolphins live in the ocean primarily in the warmer tropical waters and grizzly bears live on land in the pacific northwest where the water would be too cold for the dolphin anyway. The dolphin would be swimming around avoiding sharks and the bear would probably be eating a salmon. But if they did breed you would get a dolphinbear. Although a dolphinbear would have a very low chance of survival given it's part dolphin. Dolphins are pussies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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