In Capitalist America, bank robs you!

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eye patch? Names

Penis

Why did the man masturbate? Because there was no one who wanted to partake in sexual intercourse with him.

What is worse than falling into a pit of needles? being lit on fire and then falling into a pit of needles I imagine

96

If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

Why was the farmer buried in a grave on the top of a hill? He had died and this would be his final resting place.

Q:how do you brighten up a room? A:you turn on the lamps

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? The list goes on.

What is brown and smells? Poop

Your hat is not on you head. Where is it On you head

The horse said "nay."

This one time, at band camp we played in a band

Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

So anyways, can I have the last comment or not?

What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

So dont touch it

Knock, Knock. Who's there? A Jehovah Witness.

Why is he called Donald Trump? Because he trumps a lot...

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

Why can't Billy ride the bicycle? Billy's a fish.

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

*Knock* *Knock* Who's there? The IRS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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