What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

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Jesus said unto John, "Come forth and receive eternal life." But, John came fifth and won a toaster.

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Military intelligence.

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Why do Chinese people smell? Because of their ethnicity...plus, they smell.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree ? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was attached to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a monkey.

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What did the man say to his wife before they went to bed? Goodnight.

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A man powers up his computer but then realizes he's in China.

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant

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What do you call a man that likes fishsticks? His name

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What do you call a black armless legless man I Don't know but im kind of hungry

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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Stop being racist!Be a panda. They are black white and asian!!!!

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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A man witnessed a car crash. He was traumatized

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Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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Your momma's so fat: She has found a value in relationships beyond an aesthetic level.

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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a little girl gets raped

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops