Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

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Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

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what's faster than a jet? a speeding bullet. what's faster than a speeding bullet? light.

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Potato potato potato potato potato? Potato potato potato.

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There is a penguin at the bakery: i want 2 loaves said the baker white or brown bread says the penguin does not matter I'm a moped

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Y2K

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What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Your breath smells like onions.

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Violets are red Roses are blue I scrrewed that up Now can i screw you?

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Communism ... ... ... ... ... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

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A Horse walks into a bar. Everyone dies

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What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

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What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

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What's purple and green and has a criminal record including two counts of armed robbery, five counts of possession with intent to sell, one count of attempted murder, several citations for underage drinking, and a parking ticket? Barney, but ignore all that other stuff. His record was expunged.

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Your brother is so ugly that sometimes he gets teased at schools and comes home crying.

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Why couldn't the college student get on the internet? He can't afford a computer.

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What did the white man say to the black man? We both deserve to be treated as equals although we are from much different cultural backgrounds.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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A man walks into the bar, goes up to the bar tender and says "exuse me, please could I have a pint of bitter" the bartender says "sure"

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What do an apple and a banana have in common? They are both not cookies

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Q: What's better than a dead baby? A: Knowing who killed it, because then you can report them to your local authorities, thus creating a safer community.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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