What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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What did Helen Keller's parents do to punish her? They gave her a stern talking to and then grounded her for a couple days.

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Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

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Q: Why did the little boy cry? please answer this question in the form of a 2 page essay and back up your answer from personal experiences, your readings or any other outside sources.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy

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What happens when you cross a dog and a cat? Something.

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your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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What comes after 69? Mouthwash

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Roses are Brown Violets are Brown I hate everyone on antijoke that steals what I write I fisted a cows butt hole.

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why did the chicken cross the road Kill yoself

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What did the cancer patient say to the arab? the tumors hurt my body

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops