What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Thousands upon thousands upon thousands of dying infants.

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why does everyone hate chris. cause he's a douchebag.

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"How come the week takes so long but the weekend goes by so fast" "Because there are five days in the week and two in the weekend"

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

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What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

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What's funny about a Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian going over the edge of a bridge in the same car? Nothing, they all died

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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Why couldn't the blonde divide 5 by 0? Because it's impossible to divide by 0.

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That's what he said.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

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I'm not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical. Hey! Don't get all religous on me.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Bad-mannered Bad-mannered who? F*ck Off

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

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once three middle easterns were walking down the street bomb bomb bomb

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The government wants us to stop using gas and be eco friendly. Tell that to Hitler.

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender brings him the beer, and the man drinks it. Then the man dies in a car crash while driving back to his family

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A guy walks into the bathroom, sits down and poops.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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