Knock knock Come in!

Q: What can a bench do that a mexican can't? A: Support a family.

Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

How do you beat someone in a video game? You win it.

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

If I have 10 apples and you have 45 oranges how many plates can we fit on the roof? Purple because monkeys don’t fly

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

Two Penn State administrators walk into a butt.

why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

A peice of dust floats into a bar. Its a peice of dust so no one notices it.

Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

A: Ask me if I'm a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

What's funnier than Mexicans? Whats funny about Mexicans?

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

What's the difference between your wife and a female dog? none - they are both bitches!

How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

Yo' mama so retarded shes retarted!

Do you want to come with me? NO! oh i wanted to cum on your face. Thats god damn gay Nope thats god damn sexy.

A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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