What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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An English man, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They each buy a pint and talk about their day.

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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nbjhfghl

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Child Prostitution.

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How do you stop someone from dying of cancer? Shoot them in the head.

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

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The little mouse lifted the giant Elephant up so the Elephant could reach the bag of snacks, but then the Elephant said: I cant reach it, you must be tired so lets switch places... Squish: Squish! Elephant: Mouse! Where are you! *looks at "squish" NO! THIS WAS NOT THE WAY THE JOKE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!!!!!!! Moral: Elephants cant talk...

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Yo mommas so stupid, she got raped.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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What did the twin towers get at the pizza place? 2 planes

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What do you call a fish without an eye? fsh.

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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Why did dan jump off of the empire state building? -Because Carl pushed him off.

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“Anything that moves ey?” – William Deane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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