On the last day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... A letter saying she had gone bankrupt, as she had spent all her money buying me 12 pear trees, 35 golden rings, hiring maids and pipers and etc. for over 100 hours, and an innumerable amount of animals.

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why did the bananan explode? it was a grenade

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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The new pickup line. The human body has 206 bones in it. I have broken one of them, please take me to a hospital.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

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Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

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Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

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How can you tell you're in a childrens' ambulance from the inside? From the clown patterned body bags.

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What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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Why was the plumber very sad Because i killed his family

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What did the man who was punched in the throat say to his friend?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Whos there? NOT SALLY.

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Yo Mama is so fat cuz.. She has accumulated Obesity and needs your help to be rehabilitated due to the fact that she is at a high risk of heart attack, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and Etc. Try to motivate her to decrease food intake and increase physical activity. Thankyou

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why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

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Why did the young woman have a sore vagina? Because she just experienced intercourse for the first time and her partner was not as gentle as he should've been, given the situation.

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Welcome to AntiJoke.com Jeff. Jeff just got his mind blown.

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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American Idol

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Cripling social anxiety.

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Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

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If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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