Why did the indian man take the peanuts out of his lunch? Because he's allergic.

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Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

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How can you tell if a duck is watching you? Look at its eyes

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue And so does your mom…

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has psychotic tendencies.

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if life gives you lemons, make lemonade. unless you only get one lemon, then it really hard to make a good glass..and for that matter, who said you had a juicer? it would be really hard to just squeeze the juice out of a lemon. on top of that, what kind of situation am I in that I would need lemonade? let's say if life gives you lemons, determine the best use of them based on need, local weather and economic status

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So there's this bigass moose, and it goes in the store and it asks the lady bitch "where the potatoes at" and the lady bitch says "down aisle 5" so the moose goes down to isle 5 and there aint no potatoes.

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If 25 cows walk in to the grocery store, what do you have? A scared manager. MOO!

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There was a deaf guy who heard a mute guy tell someone that a blind guy saw a guy with no legs win the marathon

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

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What's a rabbit's favourite food? No-one knows, like humans, every rabbit has it's own favourite food.

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Why did Sally Fall Off The Swing? She had no arms Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally

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Santa Clogged my toliet

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A homeless man stumbles upon $100 bill. It is actually just a food wrapper, his eyesight is lackluster.

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Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

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yo momma is so tall shes tall

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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