Why did the used car salesman stop selling cars? He got fired.

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What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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How do you leave a man in suspense...

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

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a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why does Michael J. Fox make a great milkshake? Because he's had a successful career where he has made a substantial amount of money, allowing him to purchase high quality ingredients.

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How Long is a Chinese man.

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Why did johnny fall down? He got hit in the head with a brick

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a man walks into a bar.......ouch

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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yo mama so fat she's fat

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Why did James come back to drive the boat again this year? Because he likes driving boats and towing passengers

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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why did the chicken cross the road.

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why did Louisa go black and never go back? She got hit by a truck

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What did the aids patient do after he was diagnosed? He had sex with many more people and gave them aids as well.

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What do elephants have that no other animal has? Baby elephants.

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One Big Ass Mistake America

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Mmmmmmm Lemons

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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Yo mama's so stupid, I told her it was chili outside so she went outside with a spoon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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