What did the women order for dessert? Pie.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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If life gives you melons.. You're just plain retarded.

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Why did the cow lay down? Because he was tired

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What happens when you pour Red Bull on a butterfly without wings? It drowns......

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A rebellious teenage boy throws a dozen eggs on the street, now he has no eggs.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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q: Why does my grandpa climbs a phone pole with a bag of bananas? a: He likes to climb and he might get hungry.

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what do a snake and a bird have in common? they can both fly! except for the snake.

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how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

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Q: What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? A: "E"

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

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did you know Helen Keller had a dog? neither did she.

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what do you call a duck with no legs? a sitting duck

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your mom is so gay that...wrong, a homosexual women is considered a lesbian.

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What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

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Why did the man say how was your day? because it was the end of the day

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Ah dead on it was all Taggart!!!

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Two Jewish Rabbis are sitting in a sandbox....

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops