A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black, over twelve inches long, and has a hard time fitting in tight spaces? my double stroller.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why is the child screaming? Because he just woke up from a bad dream.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Did you hear about that one time (@ band camp lol) where there was a little boy and he wanted to go swimming sooooo abd and then ooo look squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the mushroom go to the party? He was feeling upset because his wife left him and took full custody of his three kids. His friend cheered him up and took him to the party. At the party, he did a line of cocaine and became a drug addict. He died six months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

How did the blonde screw in a lightbulb? She didn't, she fell and broke her neck and went to a hospital. Thus you should not laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What is the best thing about having sex with twenty-seven year old's? There's twenty of them

thumb_up thumb_down +59

NEIL PERT IS THE GREATEST DRUMMER OF ALL TIME!! I LOIVE SMOSH VIDEOS I SEENT EVERY ONE LOLOL

thumb_up thumb_down +53

What do you call a black Arnold Schwarzenegger? Arnold Schwarzenegger.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

^that joke's not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why the worker did not come to work? Because he died!

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Why couldn't Maria play Softball? She was born without legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

People talk about how there grandparents was in the holocaust well my grandpa was to he died. How he fell off the guard tower.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you get a movie star to go out with you? Blackmail.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

What did the Pillow say to the Blanket? Nothing. Inanimate objects do not contain the ability to speak, therefore they could not possibly say anything to each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did the man stay in the basement? Because he was addicted to pornography and it was tearing his family apart. Eventually he was unable to tell the diffidence between fantasy and reality and sexually assaulted his 13 year old niece.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops