Your momma is so fat that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook her breasts for clocks

Why does 4 +5 = Hitler? It doesnt it equals 9.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why wasn't the child breastfed? Because it's mother died while in the process of giving birth and the father does not have the necessary mammary glands to produce human milk for the young child.

What do a baker and gynecologist have in common? They can smell it, but they can't eat it.

Q- Why was Dan mourning the death of his wife? A- He wasn't he was mourning the death of his daughter who was killed in the same car crash as her mother.

Two guys walk into a bar. The third one ducks.

Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

Q: Whats better than ten babies in ten trash cans? A: One baby in ten trash cans

Whats white, and edible? white chocolate

"make me a sandwhich bitch" is what he said to his female boss and led to him getting fired and eventually losing his home. Two weeks later his family left him.

WHAT DO YOU CALL MEXICANS IN A HOT TUBE BOILED BEANS (; NO RACIAL

Women's rights.

Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

What's the difference between a black man and a monkey? Millions of years of evolution

Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

why did the old woman die? Because she was too old to live

Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

God is religiously proven to be real

Person 1: It's your birthday? Person 2: Yeah! Person 1: Oh.

A man walks into a car dealership. The salesman was nice and he bought a Mercedes.

if u dislike this u r most likely depressed

A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

What's 6 + 9? 15.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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