Du bist mein Kampf

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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yo mamma so fat she seen a yellow train full of white people and she said stop that twinkie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

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Q: What's worse then stubbing your toe? A: Coming home from school and your house is burnt down and your whole family is dead.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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DANA

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Justin Bieber

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How did the fireman get the cat out of the tree? He shot it.

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What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

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Slavery

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i said "what what in the butt, i said what what in the butt?"

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I kicked it.

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Why did little Timmy get absolutely nothing for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? One crawling out of the bottom licking its lips.

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

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A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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This one time at band camp....I put a flute in it's proper storage compartment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops