One Big Ass Mistake America

When Chuck Norris is bitten by a zombie, Chuck Norris doesn't turn into a zombie, the zombie turns into Chuck Norris

why did the baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

A fat man buys a salad

Your momma is so fat that she has really high cholesterol but also an undoubtedly warm personality.

What do you call a woman with one leg? An amputee

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

Wy do boys like big butts ? Cause it goes in easy :.:

Knock Knock Who's there (five gunshots)

I came.

Why were corners made? For crying.

your mamas so fat when she puts on a belt she has to use a bomarang to get it around her.

what do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

PENIS

Jasper sucks.

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jeff. Jeff who? Sh*t. Wrong house.

roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

What's your middle name? (Interrupt them) It doesn't matter what your middle name is! What does deduce mean? Fall down the stairs.

A seal walks into a club.

why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

what's better than animal crackers? your mom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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