Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

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What did the father tell his son on his death bed? Nothing. He was hit by a car and was now a vegetable.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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What should I name my dog?

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How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? The mexican, the black man broke his arm and the mexican is driving him to the hospital.

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Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

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What did the mollusk say to the sea cucumber? I don't know. Neither of them can talk.

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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Why did somebody text "lol"? Because they laughed out loud.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it was being sexually abused by its father.

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What did David say to Goliath? Not sure, does anyone have a Bible?

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That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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Two guys walk into a bar, one is treated for a concussion.

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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It is green and it is attached to a fence? Green paint

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Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your neighbor My neighbor who? I already told you, it's pronounced "Wu". I'm very sorry, Mr. Wu

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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