A dying homeless man walks into a Hospital. He is asked to leave because he doesn't have health insurance. He dies in a gutter next to where he shits.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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What's worse than Bin Weevils? Nick Clegg.

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my girlfriend keeps calling me a pedophile, thats a big word for a 3 year old

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Pianca going ham

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How do you make a panda toot? You punch it in the stomach.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

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Why didn't Sally eat the meatballs The meatballs ate her

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On the last day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... A letter saying she had gone bankrupt, as she had spent all her money buying me 12 pear trees, 35 golden rings, hiring maids and pipers and etc. for over 100 hours, and an innumerable amount of animals.

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How many Jews can fit in a VW Beetle? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and maybe one in the trunk, but that wouldn't be very comfortable.

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Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

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Why did the kid cross the road? He was strapped to a chicken!

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What's the difference between a white person and a chair? -The chair isn't a complete douche.

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you wanna hear a joke? no

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Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

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What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How do you kill a fox in Canada? Cut it's leg off and let it run!

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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Knock knock Violets are blue Helen Keller The Holocaust.

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Nickelback.

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Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play Chess? Because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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