"I lost the game." Hahahahahahahahahahahaha in your face

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95556

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When is a joke funny? When you read it.

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how do you get a chicken to sleep you slit it"s neck,and feed the body to your pet tiger

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There were three hungry cows in a barn. One day, one of them finds a stick of butter on the ground, and notifies the other cows of his findings. Since the barn was ran like a democracy, the cows decided via 2/3 vote that the winner of the stick of butter should be decided by a checkers tournament. The problem is that there is no good way to run a checkers tournament with three cows because checkers is a one-on-one game. The first cow suggests trying to find another cow to join in so that they could have a bracket-style tournament, but there were only three cows that lived in the barn. The second cow suggests a round-robin style tournament. The third cow informs the second cow that there is a possibility of a tie because each cow can finish with one win and one loss among the two games in a round-robin tournament. The first cow suggests that the round-robin process can be repeated until there is a winner. This joint suggestion was approved by 2/3 vote by the cows. Finally the checkers tournament begins. The first cow says to the second cow, "you butter not beat me at checkers!"

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A dyslexic man sells his soul to Santa.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies in a dumpster? One dead baby in 10 dumpsters.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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What's funny and arousing? This joke.

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When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms ... Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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What's not red? No tomatoes.

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"What starts with F and ends with a K?" "firetruck?" "no, f u c k"

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Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

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Wanna hear a joke the WNBA

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drugs.

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The WNBA

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why the second koala fall out of the tree? because it was hit by the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? because it thought it was a game.

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How does a black man make an anti joke? www.anti-joke.com/submit

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Michael J Fox likes his martini's shaken because they taste better that way.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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Two women were sitting in silence.

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A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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