A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

What do you call Morgan Freeman on a bad day? Samuel L. Jackson.

Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

Why Because

A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

roses are blue violets are red I am dyslexic and possibly a Jew EJ

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

What did the robot do when a person was shot? Nothing, it wasn't programmed for that situation.

What did the moose say to the hunter? I don't know, what? Nothing, a moose is an animal therefore it can't say anything.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

Why did the man walk into a bar? Well hell I don't know I thought you might.

For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

Roses are red, stones are gray, this poem is obvious, YOU DONT SAY??

this website...

Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Perpresher

why did the chicken cross the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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