what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

What is the same about a plum and an elephant? They're both grey except the plum

Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

What do you call someone who states the obvious? Someone who states the obvious.

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? - - - A: Nothing. If it is red all over, then it is not black and white.

what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped and left to die in the snow.

roses are red violets are blue i thought i was ugly but then i met you

why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

What notes does the tightrope-musician have to worry about? They probably have to concentrate generally harder than the average musician in order to produce any correct, good quality notes.

Q: Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? A: The backyard gate was left open

what did the noob say to the gamer your a gamer nooob

pubic lice.

How do you get a beautiful woman to go to bed with you? "How?" It's not a joke, it's a legitimate question!

Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

What did the blue man say to the purple lady? Do you want to make purple.

Hi colton

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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