Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems don't rhyme, This one doesn't.

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How do u save someone from dieing of cancer? U shoot them in the head

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Why couldn't the girl charge her phone? The charger wasn't plugged in.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot. What are you, racist?

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So dont touch it

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Bob: The whale is a creature that isn't naturally capable of creating any kind of technologically advanced unit of operations? Spectator: Was that actually a question or a statement? Bob: To be candid, occasionally my mind registers the practically indelible impression that I am not competent enough to effectively articulate my relatively subtle thoughts of philosophical value. Spectator: What'd you attempt to explicate? Bob: Hello, contemporary. Spectator: That's definitely considerably better than, "Benevolent greeting to you, fellow indigenous inhabitants of the magnificant, planetary cynosure, Earth Prime." You've managed to improve! Bob: I shall try to emulate those simpletons of this planet in order to garner new allies. Maybe next time I should just stick with some traditional routines that many people currently practice on a daily basis. Now, it's time to examine some "test subjects" so to educate myself further on the nature of my numerous classmates, purported facillitators etc. Spectator: Bye. Bob: See you next time! Wow... I amaze myself with my ability to efficiently adapt to my circumstantial situations. I mean, I am a ninja student who has developed new skills at communication! Wait... nevermind. Bystander: man, were you just soliloquizing... and personally enjoying it? Bob: Ehhh,... No? Bystander: Was that a statement or a question?

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Water, please.

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What's red and green? A frog in a blender

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What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

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One orphan said to the other, 'what are your parents called'

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What happened to the man that jumped off the cliff. He died....

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I have a door you don't have to say, knock knock.

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whats red white and blue? i dont know

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Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

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The racist uncle went to attend his nieces bat-mitzvah. Although he is racist, he is smart enough to not speak his mind, for he is in a temple, and may offend many people at the service.

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

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As a wise man once told me... "natives."

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roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

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Why didn't the man show up for work on Monday? He gets Mondays off.

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Why did Hitler smell the flower? Chicken dick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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