My dad beats my mom At checkers

What was the hardest part about the orphanage burning down? My cock.

WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy kids.

what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

you are so ugly you continuously get made fun of for it everyday and already have a savings account for plastic surgery in the near future.

A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

Why did the tortoise beat the hare. The tortoise had carcinoma thyroid cancer in the renal pelvis uterur.

How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

Baseball

when does the phrase "time heals all wounds" not apply? to people with fatal wounds.

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

Two cows are standing in a field One cow says "Mooooo"..... and the other cow says "mooooo" also because they are both cows and cannot speak

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

Why did the rhino cross the rode? Because it was the chickens day off.

Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

option 1, minecraft VS option 2, friends

how do you know if a chinese man has been in you house? your homework is done

Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

Why couldn't santa eat cookies and milk at little Jimmy's house? He has diabetes and is unable to stray from a strict diet prescribed by his local doctor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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