You throw nothing like your mother; she is actually really good at throwing.

Two oranges walking down the street, one says to the other, "Where do you live?". The other replies "I'm not telling you, you'll steel my washing"

There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

When is a joke funny? When you read it.

a guy is driving home his wife calls him and she say's be careful there is a lunatic driving on the wrong side of the road towards traffic he then reply saying they all are

Three men died and were met at the pearly gates of heaven by St. Peter. Which not only proves that there is a heaven but that St. Peter actually does greet all of its new inhabitants at the entrance which is in fact marked by gates of pearl.

ur mother

Why did the girl's cat fall from the ceiling? Because she didn't use enough tape.

What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Nothing. He is Jewish, therefore he does not celebrate Christmas, he celebrates Hanukkah. So he won't get a present for Christmas, he will get eight presents for Hanukkah. (He'll like getting a good deal).

What's funny and arousing? This joke.

Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

throbbing slobber

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

What did the 5 year old girl ask Santa for Christmas? A pony.

A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

How do you confuse a blond? Ask her to solve ( [3x - 3x^2 +1]^744 ) x ( [- 3x + 3x^2 +1]^745 )

Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

Fat people are harder to kidnap!!

your mother's head is so big that she wears very big hats.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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