Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a raging hard-on and was leering at him.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he wanted to

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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What is 18 inches long and makes a woman scream all night? Crib death.

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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Hitler was a pretty good guy I guess

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Q: How do find the population of Mexico? A: You Google it.

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What's worse than the titanic sinking 9-11

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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anus soup

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What do you get when you make a website to put jokes on? People repeating the same joke over and over again, and still managing to get good ratings.

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what kind of person screaws in a light blub........ a electrician

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Dead babies.

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How do you make a mail man cry? Run him over with a forklift.

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Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, this captain and his crew were always in danger of being boarded by pirates from a pirate ship. One day while they were sailing, they saw that a pirate ship had sent a boarding party to try and board their ship. The crew became worried, but the Captain was calm. He bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly got the Captain's red shirt, which the captain put on. Then he led his crew into battle against the mean pirates. Although there were some casualties among the crew, the pirates were defeated. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending two boarding parties towards their ship. The crew was nervous, but the Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once again the battle was on! The Captain and his crew fought off the boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked at the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, explained, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, so you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence. They were amazed at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, 'Bring me my white flag!"

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why did model 602734 have tests? he didn't

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Nickelback.

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what are three words that are never used together in the same sentence ...... salid taste good

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a carrot walks into a bar, carrots cant walk for they do not have legs.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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Why did the man jump off of the cliff? Because he was suicidal.

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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