How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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If you look up stupid in the dictionary the definition would say stu·pid? ?[stoo-pid, styoo?] -er, -est, noun adjective 1. lacking ordinary quickness and keenness of mind; dull. 2. characterized by or proceeding from mental dullness; foolish; senseless: a stupid question. 3. tediously dull, especially due to lack of meaning or sense; inane; pointless: a stupid party. 4. annoying or irritating; troublesome: Turn off that stupid radio. 5. in a state of stupor; stupefied: stupid from fatigue.

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What do you not want to get when playing scrabble? Diarrhea

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What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

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Why was the white man arrested? He was a rapist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple, your dad having sex with your girlfriend

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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How do racist jokes start? Generally with a racially insensitive stereotype.

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Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

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one fish two fish red fish kill the fish

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A member of the KKK is walking along the street enjoying the nice weather. He then turns his attention to a black man on the other side of the street and stopped dead in his tracks. He stepped on a land mine.

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When does 1=17? How many schizophrenics does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

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What do you call "Bob the Builder" when he retires Bob

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

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Nero, what if you are using me now? Manipulating me? You think I enjoy falling in love after chatting with you in a site which is not even meant for chatting? You can do that, you are a "facilitator", I don't care as much for point zero, as I do care about you, hell, if things where different, id quit the whole thing to stay with you! I could say I will never forgive you if you make me feel safe by your side, accept your help only to get stabbed in the back for trusting you.

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A man comes home from the office, walks inside and hangs up his coat and hat at the door. He walks into the kitchen to find his wife has not made dinner instead she is drinking with friends, she tells him that she would have made dinner but she didnt want to. Furious, the man storms to the door, grabs his coat and leaves... He gets in his car and drives down to the pub. Sitting there drinking his beer, trying to calm down he finds a peice of paper tucked into his coat pocket, he unfolds it and reads it. It turns out to be a memo he wrote to remind himself at work that day.

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I HATE EVERYTHING OMG PEOPLE SUCK BOYS SUCK IM TAKING MY RAGE OUT ON THE INTERNET FDJKNDLKXC

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Today is your birthday So happy birthday

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a Coke.

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There was 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. I don't know the rest of the story but the ending was when they guy came all over their faces.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Probably nothing

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Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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