What do you say to the man with lopsided balls? I am terribly sorry, your condition has most certainly left you socially alienated and confused.

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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Your momma is SOO FAT that I had to call my doctor. He said you should go on a diet and exercise. I called my local gym and gave your mom a 3 months membership. Monday to Friday. Your welcome and good luck.

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

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Whats a good source of iron? A piece of iron.

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69

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the chicken.

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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What do you call a deaf person? You don't they can't hear you.

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What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

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If you can dodge a traffic, that probably has little or no relation to how well you can dodge a ball.

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Wanna hear a joke? The 19th amendment

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A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

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Two women were sitting in silence.

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Why was johny late to school? He died

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A man walks into a bar He has a water, he is sober

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what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

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What do you call a disabled Jew? His name

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

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What does a person say before they die? Whatever their last word is

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and an orange? One is a tasty treat you can peal and enjoy and the other is an orange

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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