whats worse then getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by 2 giant scorpions!!!!!

Simon Cowell's hair is real.

what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Two black guys are in an elevator, one guy gets off at the sixth floor, and the other on the eighth. And thats it.

why did the kangaroo jump? because its a kangaroo

Why couldn't the Little Boy hear his mother yelling at him? Because his mothers died

A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

Why is the dinosaur yellow? He's not.

yo mama so fat she's fat

When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

What did the doctor tell the boy with no arms or legs? I'm sorry, you have terminal cancer.

Who flexes triceps more than anyone? James

A teenage boy tells his family that he is gay. His mother says she had always known, and they accept him for who he is.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

What in the world is that thing in her butt!!!

How can you tell if your wife is dead? She no longer has a pulse.

Josh kissing a girl

Why couldn't the cat eat it's food? It's face was stapled to the floor.

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, and says nothing. Ducks are incapable of speech and therefore it would be physically impossible for a duck to say anything. Where the duck walks up to does not partake in the matter.

You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

A man is talking to his friend at work. The man asks his friend, "Did you see the game last night?" Then a plane crashes into the building and we call it 911

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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