Q. Why did the koala bear go to court? A. Because too many people were referring to it as a bear when it is infact not a bear.

What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

Hey, come here often? No.

Roses are red, violets are blue; So go in bed, where I'll join you...

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

I have read and agree to terms of service.

There is a car full of black people.

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

A blonde walks into a store and asks for the microwave behind the counter. The man behind the register promptly hands her the microwave and charges her $435 for it, which is utterly ridiculous.

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

Relax, and I do not mean as in hypnotic "relax as you do not not... Okay I used it again I am just joking" Nice, so are they like pretty doubles or not?

Why doesn't Superman eat peanuts? He doesn't like them

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Your landlord, clear out your stuff by tuesday"

What do you call a cow with big horns? A bull.

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

what do you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientest? a mutant chicken

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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