live babies

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*Knock-Knock* "Who's there?" "The police, you're under arrest for the murder of your wife and your two children."

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knock, knock whos there? steve steve who? steve johnson hi steve

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whats the difference between a snail? - both legs are the same lenght, especially the left one.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven beats his wife.

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Wanna hear a funny story? Sure Ok.

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does this look unsure to you?

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Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

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What's bigger than a whale and has no water? Africa.

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A man about to get on a plane forgets to store his utility knife in his bag before the security scan. He is taken to a back room for private questioning and fined.

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I am a real homosexual

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What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

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What did the teacher say to the student who stepped on a rusty nail? You have to go to the Nurse's Office to get a band-aid- I don't have any.

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What's blue and smells like pee? Pee, I lied about the color

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Q: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? A: They're all gone!

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jokes r dumb

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One time I was playing hide and seek with grandma but I couldn't seem to find her. I asked my sister for help and she told me she was hiding in the living room on the shelf. I went into the living room but all I saw was a vase on the shelf. Grandma probably didn't know the game was over so I opened the vase to tell her. To this day she hasn't come out of the vase.

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Why did the sprinter lose the race He had no legs

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Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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What's the difference between zev hatis and a dwarf Nothing. They are both midgets and are going to die by the age of 25

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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