Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve? Black mail !

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What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

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why did the bird fall out of the sky? it had been shot by a bird hunter, as it was bird season.

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your momma's an antijoke

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Why did the penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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penisface

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it, it would break.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

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How come Jimmy didn't take his math test? Dead babies can't take math tests!

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Q. Why did the black man get sent to prison? A. Because he was falsely accused of murder.

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A family of black people get onto a plane. The son said to his father: "Why do planes have wings?" The father then replied by saying: "To help them fly son." The plane's wing then fell off due to a building error, then the plane crashed and everyone on board was killed.

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Your mom is so fat she beat up snorlax from pokémon, than got charged for abbuse because it is illegal to use physical violence on pokémon unless in a battle or in attempt to capture one.

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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How do you get a dead baby out of a blender? Doritos.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a big dick, Lets have sex.

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A moth walks into a podiatrist's office, the podiatrist rubs his eyes and looks again and realizes it was just a man taking off his coat in a grandeur fashion.

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A member of the KKK is walking along the street enjoying the nice weather. He then turns his attention to a black man on the other side of the street and stopped dead in his tracks. He stepped on a land mine.

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What's blue and screams when you look at it Idk that's why I'm asking you

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Dear John,

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Lindsay Lohan is often caught flashing her vagina...

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A semi-coherent black man was wandering down the street toward an open garbage receptacle. Immediately an angry, filthy raccoon jumped up, hissing and baring its fangs, as if to defend its territory against the startled negro. This happened four times in a row. Each time it was either a negro, a mexican, a crippled kid or a person of jewish ancestry. Each time the raccoon hissed viciously. Coincidence? No. The raccoon was obviously very hungry and attempting to defend its last remaining refuge of territory from the ever-increasing encroachment of man's filth into the formerly natural and pristine spaces where wildlife once lived. He is now reduced to hissing at the ethnics and the cripples, just to eek out a pitiful subsistence on trash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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