Q-What's the difference between me and Chuck Norris? A1- Nothing. We are both humans. A2- Technically, his atomic structure, genes, heritage, blood type, hair color, skin color, muscle tone, eye color, and countless other things. What's more, I am not an actor who revels in fake glory.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man runs into a psychiatrist's office and screams, "You gotta help me doc! I just killed seven people in my office building!"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Down Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's funnier than 24? 25.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

alcoholism kills

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

thumb_up thumb_down -62

Q: what did the boy get for Christmas A: a new wheel chair his legs were recently amputated due to the same cancer that killed terry fox.

thumb_up thumb_down -130

A man buys free health care...

thumb_up thumb_down +95

What do you call a Russian civil war? A war in which one side wants to seced from the other.

thumb_up thumb_down +67

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

I have read and agree to terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did the blond fail her Calculus test? She had a Biology test on the same day, and being that she is a bio major she felt it would be to her interest to put more emphasis on the bio test because she is only taking cal as an advanced elective credit, which would not effect her major GPA.

thumb_up thumb_down +57

What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

thumb_up thumb_down +57

How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

When my Xbox died, my girlfriend said: "Finally, you can treat me the same way you treated that thing!" So I tapped her so hard that she died

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

thumb_up thumb_down +51

what did the man say to the other man? hi

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What type of food was the black guy eating? fruit, he is on a diet

thumb_up thumb_down +49

A man walks into a bar and says ouch, as he stubbed his foot when he became fully enclosed in the tavern.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What happened to the chicken who crossed the road ? Quite obviously he got to the other side to be greeted by a 50 foot half man half chicken who had one leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

What did the bullied schoolboy do when he got home from school? He cried himself to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops