What did the little boy find when he came home from school? His mother hanging from a tree.

How do you start a Mexican parade? Close off the streets you plan to have the parade on, and be sure to have a decent amount of floats and marching bands.

you mother is so stupid that it takes her quite a while to understand jokes

Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

Why did the rooster go to kfc? To see a chicken strip

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

What's the deal with airline food? It's nourishing matter that sustains life, provides energy, and promotes growth distributed by flight attendants.

Why doesn't Rick Moranis come out with anymore movies? He left the film industry in 1997, six years after the 1991 loss of his wife, Anne, to liver cancer.

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? Neither have i

How do you know when there's a terrorist in an airport? There's a camel in the parking lot.

What's worse than being named Troy Merrill? Being Black.

Two muffins are in an oven. How does that even work? Muffin pans come with either 6 or 12 muffin holders.

- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Your mom is so fat, her pants are starting to get tight.

Fruitcake

What's the difference between people who make dead baby jokes and people who don't make dead baby jokes? I don't avoid eye contact with people who don't make dead baby jokes.

What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

That's as _____ as a ______ guy. Works with anything, and people do laugh.

women's rights

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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