roses are red violets are blue god made me pretty what happened to you?

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What color is my lamp? Brown

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A horse walks into a bar...n

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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What word starts with 'f' and ends in 'uck'? Firetruck

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whats the differance between a orange and a dead baby one is a delicious treat the other is a fruit

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Yo momma's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror she decided to get plastic surgery.

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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wanna hear a really funny joke? sure women's rights.

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A mexican goes to an ATM.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? -call the fire department

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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What do cats eat for Dinner? Cat Food.

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suck my a s s i hate mother f u c k e r s in my mother f u c k i n g crib

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Mexicans working in an office

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Your mom is so fat, she has crippling depression and has tried killing herself three times.

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How can a black man burn his pop-tarts? If he leaves them in the toaster for too long.

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a four door Sudan? A: Two in the front, three in the back, six million in the ash trey.

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Hey your name is really Tifa? Sorry, I hate scheming, but in this kind of situation I have to play things safe, I have a wife to take care off, I mean it, I really hate it. Anyway, I got your number, location everything, now if you did send people to harm or even worse kill me, you wont be doing that again, trust me, if I die of an assault, you die next, whoever you are.

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how do you make sure someone is dead shoot them

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why were there moans coming from the sandusky household Mike sandusky, was having sex with his beutiful wife, maria meanwhile Mike's cousin, jerry was sitting in a jail cell

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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